


Dear Ellie Chu,

by evengayerpanic



Category: The Half of It (2020)
Genre: Canon Continuation, College, F/F, Family Feels, Multi-year story, Young Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:48:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25018789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evengayerpanic/pseuds/evengayerpanic
Summary: After the events of the movie, Ellie Chu and Aster Flores have a plan to meet up again in a few years. Fortunately for them, life has other plans, and the two find themselves being brought back together again so much sooner than they ever expected.
Relationships: Ellie Chu & Aster Flores, Ellie Chu/Aster Flores
Comments: 40
Kudos: 317





	1. Dear Ellie Chu, I am in love with you.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on my Tumblr, but after a few comments and questions about if I had an Archive of Our Own account, I decided to post this here for anyone who isn't on Tumblr! I post there first, and bring my works here about a week afterwards. If you're waiting on an update, feel free to find me on Tumblr under the same name, EvenGayerPanic. There may be more there!

_Dear Ellie Chu, I am in love with you._

Aster Flores does not let a couple of years dictate what she feels. She texts Ellie Chu; every morning, every night and at least four other times daily from the day Ellie leaves on the train out of Squahamish, until the day Ellie graduates from Grinnell College.

It starts out simply, something small that Aster didn’t even think she was going to go through with sending. “If it takes 43 muscles to frown, how many do you think it takes to cry?” She’s surprised by how quickly she gets a ghost message back, but then she thinks, it’s a long train ride… Ellie has time to spare.

“How did you know I was crying?” Aster smirks slightly as she types out a quick reply, sending it seconds after reading, paint brush left precariously balanced on her easel. Art all but forgotten about.

“It was a guess.” A breath of air, and then she follows it up. “I saw Paul at the train station… He was crying, and so I thought you might have been crying too.”

She waits for a response. A minute… Two minutes… It’s at the five minute mark that Aster realizes she may have offended Ellie. She’s ten words deep into an apology when she reads back. “You were there?”

Backspace. Backspace. Erase. And then a rewrite and a send. “Of course Ellie. I had to see you off.”

“I didn’t see you.” Immediate response.

This time Aster is the one who takes time to respond, her head aching as she tries to put into words why… Why she had been stuck, practically hiding in the shadows, as Paul and Ellie said their goodbyes.

“I didn’t want to intrude… I know that he’s your person. That you’ll miss him, I didn’t want to be rude.”

Aster doesn’t want to admit that maybe things are a little awkward between her and Paul, that she’s still angry, that she’s mad that he let her kiss him… when she should have been kissing Ellie from the start.

“Don’t be silly.” Aster’s face flushes and her heart flutters in her chest. “You were my person first.”

_________________

They spend the rest of the day messaging back and forth, and it’s so freeing to not have to pretend to be people that they aren’t. Aster makes sure to use Ellie’s name as often as possible, anything to confirm to the other girl that Aster knows and is happy, that she is talking to Ellie. Not Paul Munsky. Not SmithCorona.

Aster Flores is talking to Ellie Chu.

For the most part they avoid the elephant in the room, choosing not to dwell on what happened between them. Instead it’s a fresh start, one that just so happens to exist in a world where Aster Flores stripped Ellie Chu’s shirt off, and Ellie Chu threw her bike to the ground to kiss Aster Flores. Properly.

Those two subjects do not fail to make an appearance though, even with the unspoken promise to not dwell on the past, Aster can’t help but lightly tease Ellie that she not only took her top off, but wore it as well, and Ellie still didn’t figure it out.

“In all fairness, Brontë and Austen don’t quite prepare you to be stripped at a hot spring by the most … girl that’s ever existed.” Aster blushes a bright enough red after recieving that, that her Mother sitting across from Aster, peeling potatoes, asks if she feels sick.

“The most what?” Aster finally responds from the safety of her bedroom, curled up on her pillows with a smile on her face so bright that it hurts.

“…” At the lack of response Aster begins to pry. Now is not the time for Ellie Chu to be afraid of the truth.

“The most annoying? The most frustrating? The most repugnant?” Aster teases once again, laughing as each response she makes lacks a response. “Come on Ellie, if you don’t tell me what you were going to say, I’ll only continue to think the worst about it.”

The response is immediate, and stuns Aster.

“I was going to say beautiful… amazing… unique… but I guess frustrating can work in this situation too.”

Aster shakes. Bold strokes there Ellie Chu, she smiles softly, the words a whisper to her empty bedroom. “I’m just a girl.” Aster types out slowly.

“You’re not just a girl.” 

_________________

They text until the sun has gone down, the moon has come up and the world is silently sleeping.

“My eyes are getting heavy.” Aster types out lazily, having changed into her pajamas and crawled under the covers, phone still clung to her hand like it’s a lifeline. In a way, it kind of is. Ellie is her lifeline.

The response is slower now too, they both have been fading for the past hour, and Aster is surprised that neither of them has fallen yet. “Then close your eyes.”

“I can’t.” Aster whispers as she types. “I’m afraid that when I open them again, you’ll only be a dream.”

She smiles softly as the response back is immediate and thoughtful. “I won’t be a dream. I’ll still be here.”

“Promise me.” Aster waits for a second, heart racing in the fear of sending it. Her thumb hovers over the send button, and before she can stop herself, she presses it. Her chest immediately aching in response.

Aster waits so long for a response that she can’t fight the sleep that claims her, her phone falling to the ground, a final ding heard in the background just before she completely slips into dreams that she never thought she’d ever dream of in her life.

In the morning she recovers, immediately diving for her phone on the floor and clicking on the message that she missed the night before. Aster’s eyes scan over it, once, twice, and then a smile breaks out from ear to ear.

“I, Ellie Chu, promise you, Aster Flores that I will write to you again tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that… as long as you want me to.”


	2. I think I knew it, long before the letters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really glad to see a bunch of people finding and enjoying my story! It is completed in entirety on my Tumblr, but for anyone who doesn't typically go on Tumblr, I'll be spending the next few days uploading this story as well as anything else I've written to AO3! I hope you enjoy it!

_I think I knew it, long before the letters._

Aster Flores calls Ellie Chu for the first time barely three weeks after she’s left. It isn’t planned, she can hardly remember how she got Ellie’s number, but Aster has it on her phone and Ellie keeps texting her, and so Aster Flores makes her own bold stroke, takes the deepest breath she can muster and presses call.

In the four rings it takes for Ellie Chu to pick up, Aster’s day floods back to her in a wave of complex emotion.

Aster Flores had woken up to a pile of envelopes by her front door, school mailing addresses listed prominently on the front of each one. With a squeal that she just barely hid from her parents, Aster had gathered the envelopes and ran to her room.

“I’ve got mail.” She promptly texts Ellie, including a picture of the stack of envelopes on her bed spread. Her response comes immediately, Ellie must be just finishing up class in her Literary Analysis course. 

“Amazing! What do they say?” Aster smiles, and sends a picture of her holding the first envelope, captioning it with a simple response of how she’s going to find out. “Don’t keep me waiting, Aster!”

She gets lost in reading for over an hour, going through each envelope like it’s delicate, precious, like it holds all the answers. Ellie texts her back every once in a while, with a perfectly placed “…” or “Well?” 

At the almost two hour mark, she stops, her hand shakes and she makes her bold stroke, her heart racing fast until she hears a familiar sound. “Aster?”

Aster pauses, tears welling up in her eyes. “I got in.”

There’s a soft gasp from the other end of the phone, and a happy exclamation of “Really?!” Aster nods even though she knows that Ellie can’t see her. It’s like Ellie knows though, and so she continues. “Where?”

“Everywhere.”

_________________

They’re on the phone for an hour, Aster flush with excitement as she shares the acceptance letters, the offers she’s received and the places that claim they will be happy to see her. Ellie pitches in occasionally, her own happiness beaming through the phone call.

Aster feels more free than she’s ever. But not for long.

It’s two in the afternoon when Ellie has to go, she has one last class of the day, but she bids Aster a farewell and Aster returns the farewell only to clench Ellie’s heart in a vice grip when she ends the conversation with “I love-” Aster freezes for a minute, and the call goes quiet as it’s clear that Ellie froze as well. “-that you’re there for me like this. I appreciate it, Ellie Chu.”

As she hangs up, Aster wants to viciously smother herself with a pillow. Coward, she repeats. Coward.

In that moment Aster Flores decides that she doesn’t want to be a coward any more, and so she collects her envelopes, then collects herself and goes downstairs to face her parents with her decision.

_________________

Ellie Chu calls Aster Flores for the first time only five and a half minutes after her last class of the day. 

She’s packing up her backpack and discussing with a friend on where to go to dinner when the friend notices her phone going off. When Ellie looks down, she’s met with eight missed messages from Aster and her face falls. “What’s the matter? Is it your Dad?” Her friends asks worriedly. “Or is it Paul?”

“No.” Ellie manages to mumble. “It’s my gir- it’s this girl from back home…” She feels horrible for the look that crosses over her friend’s face, but it’s Aster and Ellie would choose Aster over almost everything.

Her friend stares at her pointedly, and Ellie apologizes again, taking another glance down at her phone. Another message. “I’m really so sorry Casey, but I have to get this, it’s important. Raincheck on dinner?”

Before her friend can answer, Ellie is running down the hall and into the quad, anywhere she can find for privacy as she reads through Aster’s messages.

“That went absolutely horribly. My Dad got so angry with me for applying to colleges behind his back.”

“He thought I was volunteering for his mission trip.”

“I told him that I wanted to go to college, that I wanted to be something more than a church girl.”

“He told me that Trig is going to University in California next year, and that if I really wanted an education, I could go there with him as my fiance.”

“I told him that I wanted to be more than Trig’s wife.”

“He got even angrier at that, the moment I told him where I wanted to go… he knew. He already knew.”

“He started yelling at me about God, and how the lord wouldn’t approve if I followed you to college.”

“Ellie, he’s really upset, he wants me to go on that mission trip and he wants me to leave as soon as possible. I heard him talking about it with my Mom, he thinks it would be best if I left next weekend, he said that doing god’s work will make me see clearly. I don’t want to go, but I don’t think I have a choice.”

“Ellie, I’m really scared, please help.”

It takes her less than a second after reading the last message for Ellie Chu to hit redial and her phone to start dialing Aster Flores. She isn’t shocked when barely a moment passes before a soft but broken and tear-stricken voice answers her. “Ellie Chu…”

“I’m not letting him take you anywhere, Aster.” Ellie insists, her words coming out all too quickly, her heart racing as she hears the choked sob from the other end of the phone. “Where are you right now?”

Aster whispers. “In my room, I can hear them argue.”

“Pack your things.” Ellie demands, and if Aster wasn’t so scared of what was going to happen next, she’d be impressed by the staccato of Ellie’s voice. How each word seems like a demand, but also a comfort.

Ellie stays on the phone with Aster as she does so, offering small quips and teasing commentary as Aster goes through her entire life and manages to fit it into two small suitcases. There’s an unspoken solidarity between them as Aster debates on what to leave behind, Ellie nothing more than a listening ear when Aster needs it. Offering sage advice only when the girl asks, at least until a question forms in Ellie.

“Where did you pick? Out of all the schools?”

Aster pauses for a second, a small teddy bear in her hands as she debates if her bags have enough room for him. “University of Iowa.” She finally answers, both Ellie’s question and her own internal struggle, packing the bear in between pictures and dresses.

“I heard they have a great art program.” Ellie offers, pretending that the very idea of Aster Flores being only an hour away from her doesn’t make her heart palpitate like it did the first time they kissed.

“I wanted to be near you.” Aster offers simply, and the silence follows both of them for a minute. Aster is frozen, staring at her room. Ellie is frozen, staring at the school as people leave to go home for the night. 

“Ellie… What am I going to do? Where am I going to go? They accepted me on late admission, but the offer to start is Monday… Where do I stay until then?”

Tears prick her eyes at the sound of Aster in distress and all Ellie can do is murmur a quick plea of trust. “Let me figure it out Aster, you finish packing.”

Ellie hangs up on Aster, only to call her Father next, and after a quick three minute conversation with him, she calls Paul, barely letting the boy answer the phone with a “Ellie!” before she cuts him off.

“Aster needs our help. Can you drive over to her place and pick her up? I need you to take her to my Dad… and Paul, plan on cooking some Taco Sausage once you’re there, I think she needs some comfort food.”


	3. I was scared to admit the truth, but here goes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for your kind comments, I'm so glad you've been enjoying the story so far!

_I was scared to admit the truth, but here goes._

The four days that Aster lives with Ellie’s father before her trip to Iowa, Ellie receives near hourly updates from at least one of the three of them, and she can’t figure out who she looks forward to hearing from most during those cherished hourly updates.

“I got your Father into Spanish telenovelas, I am both sorry but also not very sorry because I’m rather enjoying watching him learn Spanish. His first word was mierda. I could not be more proud.” Aster gloats.

Paul panics one day and writes, “She hates taco sausage! She’s too polite to say anything about it, but she hates it. I can tell.” Followed by a string of cow… cat… pig? Sad emoji’s about some form of animal.

“I checked in on her, she was crying.” Her father calls her one day when it’s close to Midnight, and Ellie half-asleep sobers up to the solemn Chinese mixed with basic English. “Aster said she wishes I was her Father, he is very rude to her.” She’s quiet when she thanks him, but he is far from finished. His next words both hurt and heal her soul. “Ellie we are all she has now. I know why you love her. She is beautiful in her soul.”

Aster, Paul and her Dad make a weird sort of family, the way they all fit is strange but actually lovely, and Ellie knows that she is the final piece of that puzzle, the piece that holds the rest of them together.

Ellie Chu is almost jealous about missing it. Almost.

Four days pass though, and it’s time for Aster to start her trip to Iowa. Ellie’s on the phone with Aster almost all night, hearing her worries and fears. She battles insecurity with words of comfort… encouragement. 

Aster can do this. Ellie knows she can.

The day that Aster leaves, Ellie’s father cries. He’s only known her for a little while, but she’s quickly become like a second daughter to him. Paul cries too, but for completely different reasons. They make her food as well, help her get her bags together and Paul squishes Aster to his chest with an apology on his lips.

“It’s okay…” Aster squeaks out, maybe not forgiving Paul entirely, but finding her own love for the boy who started it all. “Besides, now I know who she is…”

As the two men watch her leave, Edwin Chu turns to Paul with a grumble. “You are not allowed to leave.”

_________________

Sunday afternoon is when Ellie knows that Aster is supposed to have arrived to her school. Aster sends texts and selfies to check in at places along the way.

The texts stop around four in the afternoon, and Ellie thinks that Aster must have arrived to her dorm room. Not wanting to bother her while Aster is supposed to be moving in and getting to know her surroundings (Ellie remembers how it was when she first moved in, there was a lot of adjusting to do), Ellie keeps busy.

Aster will text, or maybe even call, once she’s settled.

Ellie decides to make up for the dinner she missed with Casey to distract herself from waiting. The friends decide on the dorm’s cafeteria, burgers and milkshakes make their way to the table they sit at and Ellie can’t help but smirk over the fact that not just Paul, but his preferences in food have rubbed off on her more than she cares to ever admit to him.

They’re sitting across from each other, lost in conversation about class when Casey looks up at Ellie pensively. Before the other girl can ask what she’s looking at, the older blonde blurts out. “Would you like to go out sometime with me, like on a date Ellie?”

Ellie nearly chokes on her cheeseburger.

She has no idea what to say, her heart racing as she weighs the pros and cons. Pro? She’s never dated anyone before, not as Ellie Chu. Con? It’s not Aster, though Aster had said to give her a couple of years.

Casey’s hand is inching closer to hers across the table, and Ellie tries to think of what it would be like, to have someone that wants to be with you. She’s considering saying yes, and her hand stretches out to take Casey’s when a panicked shout erupts across the cafeteria.

“NO!” 

Ellie spins around in her chair, and meets Aster Flores eye to eye. Her heart stops for a second and starts beating again as she scrambles to her feet, Aster moving to her quickly and before Ellie can blink, she’s being pulled in a hug that squeezes the life from her.

“Aster…” She breathes out, but Aster doesn’t let go of her. Ellie won’t pull away either, her arms wrapping around Aster protectively, shielding the girl from the glance of students around them that heard her yell.

“Ellie Chu.” Aster whispers against Ellie’s shoulder, her hands clinging in the fabric of Ellie’s shirt, face buried into her neck. A feeling that sends a jolt of electricity down Aster’s back. To Aster, Ellie Chu feels like home.

They are broken from their embrace by the awkward cough of the blonde stood across from them. “El?” 

The pointed way that Casey says her name is lost on Ellie, but Aster picks up on it immediately. She pulls away from Ellie slightly, but refuses to let go of her entirely, her eyes sparkle as she looks at Ellie only to dull when she sees the other girls forced smile.

“Oh, right! Aster this is Casey, my friend from Literary Analysis. Casey this is Aster, my-” Ellie gets cut off.

“Girlfriend.” Aster interrupts.

“Girlfriend?” Casey’s eyebrow raises unimpressed.

“Girlfriend?” Ellie sputters, staring at Aster.

“Girlfriend.” Aster confirms, to Casey and to Ellie.

Casey stares between Ellie and Aster, both girls cheeks going pink before she sighs and turns away. “Whatever El, I’ll see you in class tomorrow.”

_________________

They’re quiet from the moment they leave the cafeteria, until they escape campus on a walk. They walk side to side, hand in hand (Aster’s insistence) until Ellie can’t ignore the stunned silence anymore.

“What are you doing here, Aster?” Ellie asks.

Aster takes a moment to answer, stopping in her tracks and turning to face Ellie with a look on her face that Ellie can’t quite read even though she knows Aster Flores. “I couldn’t let you go on a date with her.”

Ellie shakes her head. “No, I mean why are you at Grinnell right now? Aren’t you supposed to be moving into your dorm right now? Aster, you didn’t chang-”

“No.” Aster stops Ellie before she can ask. “I’m still going to the University of Iowa. You’re only an hour away from there though, I needed to see you first.”

Ellie blushes slightly, her eyes bore a hole in Aster as the other girl can’t help but look anywhere but Ellie.

“Casey was going to ask me out…” Ellie whispers.

Aster nods her head solemnly with a quiet, “I know.”

“You stopped her, Aster.” Ellie looks up now to stare at Aster, the look on Ellie’s face far from angry but curious and inquisitive. “Why would you do that?”

Aster laughs this time, her laugh busting out and Ellie can’t help but feel like she did when she told Paul about Aster’s laugh. It warms her, comforts her, and it rings in her ears as she can’t help stare at Aster Flores.

“In fairness, Ellie Chu, you interrupted Trig’s proposal to me… in my Dad’s church. Why would you do that?”

Ellie fixes her with a hard look, Aster knows why she interrupted the proposal at the church. It doesn’t need to be said, not again. They both just know.

Aster pauses, staring at the floor for a moment before the smallest whisper escapes Aster, quiet enough that Ellie has to strain to hear. “What if I’m not sure in a couple of years?” She pauses. “What if I’m sure now?”

The reveal hits Ellie in the chest like a tonne of bricks and it’s all she can do to keep from stepping back in surprise. Her heart flutters, the look on her face growing into a small smile. “I, uh, r-really?”

Aster bit her lip, taking a moment to answer before nodding her head softly, curling her fingers against Ellie’s as she pulled the girl closer to her. “I think so, I can’t stop thinking about you kissing me, and the moment I saw you with her… I snapped. The thought of you with anyone else makes me go crazy.”

The way she stands there, holding onto Ellie, her eyes deep and dark and intense, Aster Flores is the only thing in the world that Ellie Chu has ever wanted, and so she lets out a small, hopeful whisper of, “Okay.”


	4. You are my breath while underwater.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to start double-uploading, posting a chapter of this followed by a chapter of my one-shot prompts! As well as I have another fic to follow this one, a little AU but still one of my favourites.

_You are my breath while underwater._

Aster stays long enough to walk with Ellie around the outskirts of campus and then back to her dorm before they realize the time. It’s nearly nine and even though Aster swears it’s only an hour long drive, and that her late-entrance orientation doesn’t start until noon the next day, they both know she better go.

“Text me when you get to the dorm.” Ellie makes Aster promise, though neither girl moves to get up from the couch they’ve settled themselves into in the common area of Ellie’s apartment-style dorm room.

Aster nods her head, a slight pinkish blush to her cheeks as she draws patterns with the tip of her finger over Ellie’s arm, swirl around swirl. “Of course.”

Ellie isn’t used to the closeness; hugs from Paul being the one physical touch she’s had in the years since her Mom died (Ellie’s father was not a very physically affectionate man, not after her mother) and for a moment she worried she would be uncomfortable with all of the touching and holding between them.

She’s not. Aster makes it feel so incredibly natural.

“You have to go,” Ellie reminds Aster, though truth be told, she doesn’t want her to leave just as much as Aster doesn’t want to go, “You still have to unpack.”

“I know.” Aster murmurs, determined not to move.

It’s over an hour later before they’re able to detangle from each other and the couch they are curled up on.

Aster leaves, and Ellie watches her go with a pit in her stomach. Everything feels changed, different in some way. They don’t feel like the same people from a month ago, and Ellie reminds herself that they aren’t. 

They aren’t the same Ellie Chu and Aster Flores, outcasts of Squahamish in their own unique ways.

Aster Flores just had her entire life fall apart only days ago, and now she’s somewhere new with nothing and nobody to hold on to except for Ellie, and so if she clings, if she wraps her arms around Ellie’s and tucks herself into Ellie until she isn’t sure where one begins and the other ends… then Ellie is going to hold her back just as tightly until Aster feels safe again.

Ellie studies until her phone goes off again, only putting her textbook down to see that Aster got into her dorm safe, and is settling down for the night.

“Your dorm is nicer than mine, I’m in a bunk bed.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Ellie teases.

Phone dings. “For one? You’re not on top.”

Ellie chokes for the second time that night, this time on nothing but air and vague imagination when it comes to that. She’s read things. Not many, but some.

“Top bunk!” The clarifying text comes quickly, Aster seemingly caught onto her innuendo. “You would be a better roommate is all. The girl I’m in with reminds me of the girls from high school. She’s trying too hard to be the girl that everyone likes and wants to be like.”

“And who do you want to be, Aster Flores?”

Aster takes a few minutes to respond, almost like she’s re-reading the question over and over, or she’s fallen asleep. Ellie’s about to call it a night when her phone chimes. “I want to be the kind of girl that I like.”

Ellie types out an answer, erases it, types it again and erases it once more before settling on. “I like you.”

Asters next text hits Ellie square in the heart, and a small smile spreads across her face. “Good, that’s a start, because I like the girl I am when I’m with you.”

_________________

They aren’t able to see each other again for the rest of the week, or the following week after that. It turns out that starting art school a month into the semester, while allowed, comes with a lot of catch-up work.

Charcoal drawings. Oil paintings. Even a small project involving Aster carving something into clay. Ellie pretends to know all the fancy technical terms, but for her, art is more of a feeling, an emotion than an assignment worth 10-15% of your final grade.

Still Ellie stands by dutifully… Listening to late night text rants about art theory. On the phone for hours with Aster painting in the studio and Ellie studying in her room, only talking to trade ideas and view points. 

They both thrive in their new environments. 

Every day after class there always seems like something to share. There’s nothing like having the same interests as the person you’re interested in. Ellie can listen to Aster talk for hours about new techniques she’s learning. Aster can challenge Ellie on near every literature assignment that she is given.

Without realizing it, Fall starts to settle in, the trees once green with life start to change to reds, and oranges, and yellows. It’s the middle of October, early Saturday morning when Ellie is awoken by Aster’s call.

“Come to the beach with me today.” The demand comes before Ellie can even get her glasses on, much less greet the other girl and wish her a good morning.

Ellie is dumbfounded for a moment, the possibility of seeing Aster again is all that Ellie wants, but still-

“I’ve got a test on Monday, and don’t you have that painting assignment on colour realism due?”

“You can study tonight?” Aster sounds hopeful.

“What about your assignment, I thought your studio time was today?” Ellie wants to agree more than anything, but she’s responsible. Painfully responsible.

“It got bumped to tomorrow, so, I have the day.” There’s a smirk to Aster’s voice, before a final plea is made. “Ellie, come on, please? Let’s get out of here.”

_________________

The ride to the beach is so different from their ride to the hot spring what feels like a life time ago. This time instead of the radio being their soundtrack, it’s talking and debating and laughing. It’s far from awkward.

“Fried Green Tomatoes?” Ellie asks seriously.

Aster turns her head for a second from driving, her car having been a secret mission Paul went on to get it for her before she left, to stare at Ellie expectantly.

“What?” Ellie asks, popping a fry into her mouth.

“Book? Movie? You need to give me more than that, Ellie.” Aster chastises her, but it’s nothing but playful.

“Both.”

“Thin ice, my dear, thin ice. The movie was phenomenal, but very different from the book. In the book, Ruth and Idgie’s love was loud and proud and out. Movie, though? You had to look between the lines for that same special intimacy.” Aster grins, sneakily stealing a french fry from Ellie’s hands.

Ellie’s mouth drop opens, before she’s laughing with Aster, beach drawing nearer the further they went.

“You should be in my Feminism and Difference class, I swear you understand more than half the people in my program do. They just don’t get Fannie Flagg.”

“Art History’s more my thing, I read for fun. Besides, this just means that you get to be the one to fill our private library, and I’ll handle our gallery.”

“Fair.” Ellie agrees as they pull up to the beach.

_________________

They’re at the beach all day, Ellie not realizing how much there was to do without going in the water.

They collect shells from the sand, Aster determined to find the best ones for her next assignment on ‘Painting with Textures’. For a while, Ellie skips stones as Aster does a rough sketch of her. They get food, walk hand in hand along a private dock, but most importantly they talk. They talk for hours on end.

They talk until the sun starts to go down, and they lay out a blanket (Aster really thought of everything) to watch the sun set in silence, curled together happily.

Ellie doesn’t end up studying that night, the two of them falling asleep on the beach, wrapped up in each other as the cold sets in until a bout of rain has them dashing for the car with peals of laughter.

When they return to their respective colleges the next morning, they’re both in uncomfortably wet clothes, necks sore from finishing the night sleeping in Aster’s car, but neither Aster or Ellie seem to care.


	5. You are my light in the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another day, another chapter! Thank you all so much for your support! And please, do consider checking my Tumblr for the rest of my fanfictions as I haven't posted nearly any of it to this account yet! You can find me on Tumblr under the same name that I have here, EvenGayerPanic! I've got a page that will show you everything I've wrote so far, and for which fandom.

_You are my light in the dark._

The relationship doesn’t happen overnight, despite what they feel about each other and even the whole ‘girlfriend’ comment the night that Aster first moved into her dorm. Ellie still isn’t sure if Aster meant it, or just didn’t know what else to say with Casey looming over them, staring expectantly.

It’s subtle, small changes that Ellie picks up on. The ones so tiny that if you blinked you could miss them.

It’s the way that Aster holds onto Ellie whenever they go anywhere, hand in hand with the other girl even when they don’t need to be. They walk through parks in the cool, crisp autumn air. They drink tea and hot chocolate in little bookstore cafe’s. They play around in thrift stores, both trying on ridiculous finds and laughing when they look in the mirror at themselves.

They do this all joined at the hand, Aster’s fingers looped around Ellie’s or vice versa depending on day.

A month passes from their day at the beach, and then another one as Ellie and Aster try to juggle their new lives at school, with the old familiarity of each other. They spend the week busy, hard at work, still texting and calling every day though, multiple times.

Weekends are carved out for them though, it’s not unusual for Ellie and Aster to go out early Saturday morning, and not return until Sunday afternoon, the only tale of their excursion in the miles put on Aster’s car, or sometimes the small things they bring home.

In November, a local theatre starts putting on plays that are directed, acted and written by the students of University of Iowa, and Grinnell College together. 

What starts as an excuse to see the work that Aster put into painting a set, turns into their weekly night out. After school on Wednesday’s, Aster picks Ellie up, they go out for dinner (switching between who gets to choose) and watch one of the many plays put on.

Aster has dipped a paintbrush in almost every play they see. Ellie can’t help but beam every time they give her a shout out during the curtain call, even though Aster blushes a bright red when it happens.

Mid-way through December; exams sneak up on them, the play’s shut down and Ellie and Aster have to limit their time together in order to study. It’s only a week before Christmas break when one of the directors of the plays approaches Aster and asks her if she wants to go to a cast and crew party the day before the school shuts down to celebrate a successful run of productions that she helped on.

At Aster’s hesitance (Ellie and her had planned to leave right after school to head back to Squahamish), he draws her in with a knowing and playful smirk. “You can bring your girlfriend if you want to?”

She promises him that they’ll both be there, if only because Aster kind of likes the idea of the entire production team and cast, thinking that Ellie is hers.

_________________

It’s the second party that Ellie Chu has ever been too, and at first she feels just as incredibly uncomfortable and out of place as she did at the first party.

But then Aster is taking her hand and dragging her through the crowd of people to a corner of the room where Ellie vaguely recognizes some of the faces. She recalls Jeremy, an over-enthusiastic actor, as he greets her with a grin and a drink that he offers to Ellie.

“It’s Pepsi.” He explains, with a smile and a flourish of his hand. “Aster said you aren’t big on drinking.”

Ellie thanks him with a grin, getting dragged into a conversation by Cody, Jeremy’s boyfriend, about what she thought of his play. They talk for a little bit about the merits of his use of allegory, Ellie pleased to find out that he too is in some form of English degree. 

Aster excuses herself from the conversation for a second, and Ellie watches as she rushes over to greet Christie, her costuming friend that just showed up.

Ellie grins as Aster lets out a laugh that makes her eyes sparkle, and Cody gives her a knowing look, taking a sip of his Palm Bay before teasing gently. “You’re lucky you know, to have a girlfriend as cool as Aster.” Ellie turns to him. “She really lights up our rehearsals, cracking jokes while painting.”

The information starts to sink in, the smile making it’s way from one cheek to the other. “Well that’s Aster… She’s pretty amazing.” Ellie settles on telling him.

Halfway through the night, they’re all hanging out in a circle, talking and laughing about mishaps on set, as the rest of the party blares around them. Ellie is comfortable with the group, sandwiched between Aster and Cody, Jeremy on the other side of Cody, Christie on the other side of Aster and three other girls from the play across from her. She gets to feel included, as Cody brings up something that happened during a performance Ellie was at.

She’s starting to think that nothing could possibly ruin the night, when one of the girls across from her starts making eyes at Aster. “Do you guys remember when my dress ripped, and Aster ended up giving me her jean jacket to cover the tear until the show was over?”

The rest of the group laughs, but Ellie only feigns a small smile as she sees the way the girl, she thinks her name is Laura, looks at Aster with a glint in her eye.

The girl keeps singing Aster’s praises, and Ellie goes along with it, smiling and laughing with the others, until something hits a little too close to home. “You’re lucky you two came from the same hometown, if I had met Aster first, I definitely would have stolen your girlfriend away, Ellie Chu.” Laura grins.

The laughter that follows is more awkward and uncomfortable, Ellie getting to her feet with a shuffle and murmuring out an excuse about needing to use the washroom, before nearly running from the group.

“Ellie!” Aster is quick to chase after her, meeting her in the hallway leading to the bathroom with a sudden grip of Ellie’s forearm, stopping her dead in her tracks.

“I’m sorry, Laura was really out of line there.”

“It’s not that.” Ellie pales, her face a mixture of embarrassment and something else that she can’t pinpoint. “Everyone keeps calling me your girlfriend, but we’ve never talked about that, and I guess I’m confused. Am I your girlfriend? Are we dating?”

“Oh.” Aster stops this time, going quiet.

They look at each other for a moment afterwards, neither one willing to move, to make the first leap.

“I thought we kind of were-”

“I mean I want us to be-”

They talk over each other for a moment before going quiet again, Ellie looks at Aster and blushes slightly.

“Is that what this is, you’re not sure what you mean to me, after what happened, you still don’t get it?”

Ellie nods. “I’ve never done this before.”

“Neither have I.” Aster quips back quickly, shaking her head. “Yes, I dated Trig and Paul… but do you think that if either one of them made me feel the way that you make me feel, I wouldn’t still be in Squahamish with them instead of here with you?”

Aster’s voice is harsher than she wants it to be, and she immediately relents when she sees how unsure Ellie looks. Her features soften as she grabs Ellie’s hand. “I’m sorry, Ellie. Come here.” Aster whispers gently as she pulls the girl into her arms.

Ellie places her hands on Aster’s hips, as Aster moves her arms around Ellie’s shoulders and leans in, until their noses are almost touching. Ellie has a shiver run down her spine, and then Aster closes the space between them, pressing her lips against Ellie’s gently. 

They stay like that for a moment, and then Ellie deepens the kiss. Aster smirks into it, refusing to pull away for another moment. By the time they stop, their lips are kiss-bruised and they’re both laughing.

“Yes, we are dating.” Aster grins from ear to ear, throwing in with a tease. “That good with you?”

“Absolutely.” Ellie nods, leaning in to kiss Aster again.


	6. You are the song I can't stop singing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter deals with light themes of homophobia, if you are triggered by homophobia, please tread carefully!

_You are the song I can’t stop singing._

Aster Flores and Ellie Chu return home to Squahamish for the week surrounding Christmas. 

The plan is for Aster to drive them down, the girls will then spend the week with their respective families (though they plan to spend Christmas Day with Paul), before returning to spend a few days in each other’s dorms together with their friends before school starts back up again and they get busy with school work.

The drive down is peaceful, calming. It’s been less than twenty-four hours since they decided they were dating but already Ellie Chu feels a change in the air.

It could be the way that Aster Flores keeps staring at her. Like all she’s ever wanted was Ellie Chu, and Ellie can’t tell if it’s the first time Aster has looked at her like that or if she’s always looked at her like that and Ellie never noticed because she didn’t let herself stare back at Aster long enough to actually catch her.

“Are you sure you’re okay with going back to your house, Aster?” Ellie asks worriedly, remembering only months ago when she had to get Paul to rescue her. “Dad would love to have you stay with us.”

“I’ve never missed a Christmas with my family, besides, they can’t still be angry with me, right?”

Ellie nods, she can’t imagine being angry with Aster for three minutes, let alone three months. “If you-”

“If I need you… I know where you are.” Aster interrupts, fixing her girlfriend with a smile, before bringing their joint hands up to her lips and kissing Ellie’s knuckles. “Trust me, Ellie, I won’t stay there if it turns bad. I’ll come right back home to you.”

“I know.”

Aster parks the car in front of the station, a throw back to the night following the hot spring. Only instead of kissing Paul beside some garbage cans, Aster helps get Ellie’s bag out of her trunk and then stops before getting back in her car to kiss Ellie.

Aster cups Ellie’s face with her hands, keeping the other girl close for an extra few seconds, gathering the strength to drive away. Since kissing at the party, they haven’t gone very long without repeating the action, both girls smiling into the kiss like it’s their very first all over again. Along the road, every stop they made was punctuated with kissing… A lot of kissing.

They’re gearing up to go days without each other, and while they know it’s good for them… after all, they won’t be able to see each other every day when they’re back at school, neither one of them wants to lose this new found closeness. They are complete.

“Tell your Dad I said hi.” Aster smiles.

“Tell your Dad- nevermind.” Ellie watches as Aster gets back in her car and drives away back home.

She isn’t left alone for long, her Dad pops his head out of the window barely a minute later and lets out an excited shout. “Ellie!” He turns his head back into the house to say something and seconds later, Paul appears next to Edwin in the window.

“You’re home! Ellie, welcome home!” Paul cheers.

She scrunches up her face, eyebrows furrowing as she stares at Paul for a good second in confusion. “Why are you at my house?” She yells up to him.

He doesn’t answer her, instead he just yells back “Taco Sausage!” until she rushes to the door, climbing the stairs by two’s until Ellie is back in her house.

Edwin is the first to hug her, and she takes it warmly, sinking into her Dad’s embrace because no matter what, she knows that he has her back. Paul lingers just behind her Dad until Ellie opens an arm, and he rushes them both, squishing father and daughter Chu in his muscled arms. “We missed you.” He breathes.

She fixes him with another off-put glance, looking at her Dad and raising an eyebrow. Edwin Chu just claps Paul on the back and looks at Ellie. “Where is Aster?”

“At her parents house.” At the look of her Dad and Paul’s combined worry, Ellie shakes her head. “She said she’d come here if anything happens, and promises to visit before we leave no matter what.”

Paul smiles at the reassurance. Edwin still looks cautious, though it all goes away as Paul enthusiastically shouts. “It’s Taco Sausage time!”

_________________

Things are pretty quiet in the Chu (plus Munsky) household for most of the night. Edwin throws on a movie and promptly falls asleep within fifteen minutes leaving Ellie and Paul to talk alone in whispers from their spots in the small living room.

“Are you guys happy?” Paul asks gently, no tint of jealousy in his voice, as he watches Ellie answer a text from Aster. “You seem lighter, Ellie. Less unsure.”

“Unsure of what?” Ellie stares, challenging him to answer, to say something to ruin the moment.

Except he’s Paul Munsky, and he understands Ellie.

“Yourself.”

Oh. That certainly wasn’t the answer Ellie was imagining, and for just a moment she’s stumped, stuck on not knowing what to respond with. Another chime from Aster fixes that problem immediately.

“Yeah, I am.” Ellie answers thoughtfully, a small smile comes across her face as she reads the text she just received. “Aster just told her Mom, and apparently Mrs. Flores said she understood.” Ellie laughs.

Paul smiles. “Good! You guys deserve to be happy!” He smirks a little before throwing out tease that has Ellie whipping a pillow at him. “Besides, you two understand all of that smart junk better than I ever could, it’s like you were made for each other.”

Ellie looks down at Paul, smiling reaching from one ear to the other, and for a second she wonders how she ever got so lucky to find him. The crazy boy who waltzed in her life and asked her to teach him how to write a love letter, only to teach her more about love than Ellie ever knew that she was missing.

“So, are you and my Dad like best friends now?”

“I think so, on Friday’s he lets me pick the movie.”

Ellie gasps. “I never even got to do that!”

_________________

Aster and Ellie don’t get a chance to see each other until Christmas Eve. Aster’s family keeps her busy with traditions, and dedication to the church, and well… more family. Her Grandparents fly in from Sacramento, an Aunt and Uncle from Massachusetts and a Second (she thinks) Cousin from New York City.

Ellie’s family keeps her busy with trying new sausage recipes, and watching movies, and catching up.

The morning of Christmas Eve, Aster texts Ellie as usual, but this time with a request that Ellie just knows is a terrible, awful idea… and yet, because it’s Aster and she can’t refuse her anything, she agrees.

“I have to sing at the Church tonight, Dad’s insisting. Will you be there, please?” Aster pleads Ellie.

“What time?” Ellie answers, and then immediately texts Paul. “We’re going to Church tonight, okay?”

“Have you met my family? Duh.”

Ellie and Paul arrive to the church right on time, choosing a pew somewhere near the back once Mrs. Munsky agrees to let them sit away from the family. She adores her son’s little friend, but she doesn’t want the stares of everyone who was present at the proposal fiasco last year, to be on her family.

There are hushed whispers as she walks in, all eyes on Aster, including Ellie and Paul’s as she takes her place behind her Father as lead in the church’s choir.

Aster starts singing “We Three Kings” and Ellie can’t remember anything else of Deacon Flores’ sermon after that. Ellie gets lost in Aster’s angelic voice, and the eyes that are focused on her and only her.

It isn’t until Paul starts yanking on her arm that Ellie realizes the sermon is over, and that everyone seems to be mingling. “Come on…” He encourages, pulling her up and dragging her slowly to Aster. “It’s been four days since you saw each other? Let’s go see her!”

Ellie only argues back slightly, heart racing as they get closer to where Deacon Flores and Aster are talking with one of the elderly women in the committee.

“So, dear, are you still with that sweet Trig Carson?”

Aster looks wildly uncomfortable at the thought and begins to shake her head no when her father interrupts her with a firm grasp of her shoulder. “Not quite! They’re taking a break while she goes to school, but I’m sure they’ll be back together soon. Aster wants to graduate before settling down with Trig.”

Ellie stops mid-step and stares, unimpressed with her girlfriend’s father. She spares a glance at Paul and sees that he too looks just as angry and annoyed by the Deacon’s words as she does.

Aster meets Ellie’s gaze and finds her voice. “No, Dad, I already told you… Trig and I are over, this isn’t just a break so I can go to school, I don’t love him.”

The well-meaning church woman excuses herself, but she doesn’t get far before the Deacon’s sharp tongue lashes out at his child. “Aster you stop this right now, we let you go off to school, but we aren’t supporting this crazy idea of you and-”

“No, I’m seeing someone else, I love someone else, okay?” Aster steps away from her Father over to Ellie and takes her hand tightly, fingers wrapping around each other in desperation. “I love Ellie, okay?”

The next few minutes go by in seconds, Ellie freezing at the proclamation, before she’s getting pulled away from the group that’s started to crowd them.

Paul gets them out of the church and into the snow, the girls linked together by hand as he guides them to his truck with the promise of. “We can all watch a movie when we get back home.” Ellie and Aster don’t hear him over the pounding of their hearts.

As they reach Paul’s truck, Ellie stops Aster, using their joint hands to pull Aster into her arms, wrapping them around the other girl’s waist and tucking her head into Aster’s neck until she’s kissing her softly; her cheek, her neck, her chin and finally her lips. 

“Hey Aster.” Ellie finally murmurs, her muffled words almost drowned out by the wind, the only indication that she’s been even heard is the small noise Aster makes against Ellie’s lips.

“I love you too.”


	7. You understand me, when nobody else can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your comments! I'm really enjoying them! :D I appreciate all the feedback!

_You understand me, when nobody else can._

With “I love you” and all the internal questions about their relationship out of the way, a calm wave falls over Ellie Chu and Aster Flores. They fall into rhythm, both in life and love. It feels natural and calming. 

They still text every morning and every night, phone calls in between and each conversation ends with a proclamation. “I love you.” Ellie tells Aster every time it feels right, and Aster says it right back. I love you.

They start going out on Tuesday’s for coffee as well as Wednesday’s for their typical dinner and a play, their schedule’s even line up enough that on Friday’s they are able to join Christie, Jeremy, Cody and the gang for glow in the dark bowl night. It’s simple, but it’s another evening they’re able to see each other.

Days turn to weeks, and weeks turn to months, and the world feels like it’s spinning just slightly faster than it’s normal rotational pattern around the sun. 

What used to be the monotonous groundhog day of life turns into so much more as Ellie discovers not only more about what loving Aster Flores is like, but more about herself in the process. She makes friends, she has experiences, she is able to tutor her classmates, instead of just writing papers for them.

Before she can blink, it’s the last day of her first year of school. She’s survived freshman year and is faced with a decision. Back to Squahamish for the summer, or see if she and Aster can survive the real world for a few months before returning to their normal.

_________________

“Where do you want the bookshelves to go?” Paul Munsky asks as he lugs a huge pine bookshelf up their front staircase nearly by himself. Edwin Chu is trying to help, but all four of them know that it’s technically Paul who is doing all of the heavy furniture lifting.

“Two in the living room by the television, one in the bedrooms and the last one in that little room down the hall, beside the desk.” Aster answers as she flies past him, going to the truck to grab another box.

“There’s four bookshelves?” He mouths over the shelf he’s holding at Edwin, who just nods with wide eyes.

“Ellie.” Paul calls into the bedroom as he backs into the area. “Why do you guys have four bookshelves?”

“She told you there were four? That’s incorrect.” Ellie smirks at him, directing the two of them as to where they can place the first shelf of many. “There’s five, just one is smaller, it’s technically only art supplies.”

She starts laughing as Paul sputters, Edwin clapping him on the back in solidation, both men insisted on being the ones to bring the heavy furniture in, something that Ellie can tell they already regret.

As Aster brings a box labeled “Plath, Austen and Dickinson” into the room, she raises an eyebrow at Ellie’s laughter towards Paul. “What did I miss?”

“Paul asked why we have so many shelves.”

It’s Aster’s turn to laugh this time, dropping the box onto their empty mattress and turning to fix him with an obvious look of amusement. “Really Paul, really?”

“I get it! It’s you guys…” True to his nature, he smiles and laughs along with them, noting that he’s known them both long enough now to not have to ask. “Dumb question.” He admits, before stretching a little and turning to Ellie. “Though can one of you help me with the next shelf, I love the Ed-man, but these shelves are heavy and I don’t want to hurt him.”

Aster nods, nudging his arm with her own. “I’ll help you, come on.” Then she’s nearly racing Paul down the stairs, leaving Ellie and her father alone to talk.

Like a good, supportive father… Edwin Chu does not remark on the fact that there is only one bed in the two bedroom apartment the girls have rented. Nor does he mention the questionable art that Aster has created in her gender and human sexuality course.

Instead he fixes Ellie with a smile and a soft spoken whisper of. “Your mother, would have loved her.”

Ellie is not an emotional person, not by a long shot, but even that manages to bring tears to her eyes. “What about you?” She questions, glancing at her father intently like she’s a small child again, eager to have her Dad’s approval and to know he cares.

“After you and your mother, she is my third favourite person in the world.” He decides on, before a small pause takes him and he adds in. “Don’t tell Paul.”

Ellie bursts into laughter, her arms wrapping around her Dad as she lets him hold her for a minute. It’s a big moment for the two of them, an embrace before Ellie begins her life not living at home. Edwin is proud, but sad, though you can’t tell by the smile on his face as Paul and Aster return with the second shelf.

_________________ 

It’s ten at night when Aster Flores and Ellie Chu finally get to sit down and take a moment to themselves. 

Paul and Edwin left around eight to travel back to Squahamish, the rest of their friends from college stayed only about an hour afterwards to have a drink. They tidy up the plates and cups from the pizza and beer, a simple payment considering that everyone took time out of their weekend to help them move in.

It’s when they noticed Ginny has fallen asleep in a box that they quietly stop cleaning and instead resolve themselves to curling up together in the living room. Their cat, Virginia Woolf, a silent inspiration.

They have a full-sized sofa, and even a love seat… but like normal, they squeeze into the armchair that they adore. It’s not quite the same one from Squahamish (After eight months of movie nights with Edwin, Paul claimed he had earned the right to steal Ellie’s chair) but it’s close enough. It even has the added bonus of being just big enough to comfortably fit Ellie and Aster, only sitting on each other’s laps of course.

“Thank you.” Ellie murmurs, face pressed into Aster’s shoulder. “For handling the book thing with Christie and Paul. I know they meant well, but…”

Aster leans back against Ellie, head dropping into the crook between Ellie’s chin and her neck. “You’re particular about your books Ellie, I know baby.”

Ellie nods, her face just slightly pink remembering the look of surprise on her bestfriend and Aster’s bestfriends face when they tried to touch one of the book boxes and Ellie had stopped them quickly. “I’m particular.” She smirks. “Sounds better than crazy.”

“You could never be crazy.” Aster mimics Ellie, a smile on her face as she turns and gets up from the chair, hand outstretched to grab Ellie’s. “Come on.”

“Where are we going?” Ellie already knows.

“To our bedroom.” Aster smiles, eyes lit up with happiness and excitement. “That’s ours. That we share. Together. Just the two of us… well and Ginny.”

“The cat doesn’t count, sweetheart.”

Aster gasps playfully. “We’re going to pretend that you didn’t just say that.” She teases, stopping to pet the sleeping cat before sidestepping some boxes to get to their room. “Now come on. We finally have our own bed, and it’s big enough that I don’t have to sleep on top of you anymore.”

Ellie fakes a frown. “Aw. I liked that part.”

She ducks in time to miss a pillow flying at her face, before Ellie is breaking into a slight run, chasing Aster into their bedroom, laughter filling the apartment.

This is what home sounds like.


	8. I'll stay by your side, even when scared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for this chapter being late, I had an emergency at work that shook me up a lot and I'm trying to get back into a good head space.

_  
I’ll stay by your side, even when scared._

Two years can change a lot of things. 

For a child, two years can be the difference between a baby who only sleeps, eats and cries for Mama, and a toddler with their own thoughts, opinions and voice.

For an elder, two years can be the difference between getting around just perfectly well on your own, and being confined to a chair with your mind fading.

For an adult, two years can be a difference, or it can be just another two years. Some people change in those years, and others, well they just clearly don’t.

Ellie Chu falls into the former category.

When she left Squahamish… Ellie Chu felt like all she could ever be was scared, unsure, and confused. She wore baggy hoodies, thick-rimmed glasses and a frown over kissing the girl of her dreams for the first time ever, only to have to leave her the day after.

She returns to her hometown; completely, utterly different from the ghost of her past self in every way.

That Ellie Chu layered clothes over clothes, being a Russian Nesting Doll of t-shirts, and undershirts, and long underwear. This Ellie Chu wears tank tops, and long-sleeves, or plaid that actually fits her right.

This Ellie Chu wears contacts instead of her usual.

This Ellie Chu doesn’t run away after kissing Aster Flores, the promise of “See you in a few years,” masking how afraid she is of rejection. This Ellie Chu gets to hold her girlfriend’s hand tightly, and wrap her arms around her, and kiss her whenever she wants to kiss her, and do just so much more than that. No fear.

It isn’t just Ellie who has changed either.

Aster Flores has gone from the god-fearing church girl who almost married a man she didn’t love because of her Father’s demand, to an out and proud bisexual woman. She marches in Pride Parades with her friends, and paints masterpieces that don walls of her and Ellie’s favourite queer coffee shop back home.

Whatever they were when they left Squahamish, they return two years later so much more than that.

Squahamish on the other hand? Hasn’t changed a bit.

_________________

They weren’t planning on coming back, not after the disaster that Christmas was. For the most part, they had kept to that idea. Their first summer after college was spent in their own apartment, working and making a home. The following Christmas was spent there too, Aster and Ellie inviting Paul and Ellie’s Dad to join them and friends from college for the week.

Ellie calls them the “Left Behinds”.The group full of college kids who’s families couldn’t be bothered. Aster and Ellie’s place becomes the go to for birthday dinners, Thanksgiving, Christmas or just when you need a meal, or to talk with zero judgement.

When Paul shows up, he’s always welcomed home. 

He doesn’t always understand the jokes they make, and he can’t join in on some of the more literature-based discussions, but he’s fiercely loyal to the ‘Left Behinds’ and they all know he is Ellie’s person, so they include him as often and immediately as they can.

Edwin Chu adopts as many of the ‘Left Behinds’ as he can, sending them back to their dorms with dumplings, or a well-received pat on the back for their accomplishments. They don’t always understand him, and he doesn’t always understand them, but paternal love is a universal language.

Their second summer is supposed to be the same, but they are called back to Squahamish by Paul Munsky, and his Taco Sausage, or rather the opening of a food truck that he’s scrimped and saved to buy.

Ellie holds Aster’s hand the entire drive back, the girl shaking in displeasure at returning to what Ellie’s English teacher once dubbed “Hell-quamish.” 

She wasn’t far off.

From the moment they arrive, Ellie can hear the whispers of rumour flying around. As small and unseen as Ellie felt before, she’d give anything to go back to fly under the radar. Being seen is much worse.

_________________

They arrive back on a Friday night, Paul’s truck opening is supposed to be Saturday, and they want to take him out to dinner before things get crazy.

It’s just the four of them; Aster, Ellie, Paul and Christie, out for dinner at the diner to talk about their plans.

Paul’s plan is to see how far the food truck can take him, Christie is going to join him for the summer (Aster and Ellie share a knowing glance at that) and the two girls will be up for only the weekend before they have to get back for work and their cat.

They’re enjoying milkshakes, fries and telling stories when they begin to hear the whispers around them.

“What are they doing here?”

“They have a lot of nerve.”

“I wonder what Trig would say…”

“Forget Trig, what about her Father?”

Aster stiffens in her spot, her face going pale and she clings to Ellie’s hand a little tighter. The three others at the table notice immediately and stop laughing at whatever Paul had just said. They instead reach across the table for their friend, soft smiles on their faces to try and comfort Aster as the whispering continues.

“Do you think they’re still together?”

“Probably… such a shame.”

“Yeah Aster Flores had a future before Ellie Chu.”

At the last one, Paul begins to stand up, his face an unrecognizable mask of anger and his chest puffed out like he’s ready to go to battle. In a way, he is.

Ellie stops him immediately, as much as she loves how protective Paul can be, this weekend is about him and not her. She doesn’t want him to get worked up the night before his truck opens, he has better things to think about than Squahamish homophobes.

“Don’t.” She whispers, and Aster nods in agreement.

Christie puts a hand on Paul’s shoulder and squeezes it gently, one look from her and Paul has almost completely calmed down. “Come on sweetie, let’s walk the girls home and then we can make sure that everything’s ready for tomorrow.” She pleads.

They gather their things to leave, the entire time, the table across from theirs stares at them unimpressed. 

By the time they get back to Edwin Chu’s house, Aster still hasn’t completely returned to her normal color. They bid Paul and Christie farewell with a promise to see them tomorrow, and then Ellie drags Aster upstairs, past her sleeping Dad and into her old bedroom.

“Talk to me, Aster.” Ellie says, getting her girlfriend to sit down on the bed, kneeling across from her and holding her hand tightly, protectively. “Come on.”

“I’m sorry I froze. I wanted to stand up to them, but I was just so scared to say anything.” She whispers.

Ellie nods silently, she understands.

“I knew those girls… Danielle sat beside me in Geography, Becca and I used to double-date with our boyfriends. It’s not like I’m a stranger to gossip about.”

Ellie squeezes Aster’s hand. “They don’t understand, okay? They don’t understand and that angers them.”

Aster looks up at Ellie, holds her arms out and Ellie settles herself in them. She pins Aster to the bed, holding her close to her, hands rub up and down Aster’s arm in slow comforting strokes. Ellie presses her lips to Aster’s forehead and holds her tighter.

“Why didn’t it bother you?” Aster whispers into Ellie’s chest, curled up like Ellie Chu and Ellie Chu alone could protect her. “They were being rude to you.”

Ellie shrugs her shoulders. “When I lived hear, not many people were very nice. I got used to it.”

“That’s awful, Ellie.” Aster frowns and holds tighter.

Tucking her head against Aster’s shoulder, Ellie just whispers into her ear. “I got you out of it, I’m happy.” 

The two of them don’t know what tomorrow is going to look like, at the opening of Paul’s food truck, with the entire town there… but neither Aster nor Ellie see to care as they fall asleep wrapped up in each other.

_________________

The day of Paul’s food truck opening is full of laughter, pride at seeing their friend accomplish his dream, and food. Lots and lots of amazing food.

There is more whispering though, and this time it seems to be even less friendly than it was before.

Aster has to hear about how Ellie Chu ruined her life, how she’s too pretty to be a lesbian, and a lot more choice words she’d never dare to repeat out loud.

The final straw is when her family arrives to show their support of Paul’s spectacular opportunity for the town of Squahamish, and promptly ignore Aster.

Aster lasts exactly twenty-seven minutes and thirteen seconds of them pretending she doesn’t exist before she’s practically exploding at the seams.

“Are you really not going to say anything to me, Dad?” Aster taps on her Father’s shoulder as they stand in line for the food truck. When he refuses to answer, she turns to her Mother and does the same. “What about you, Mami?” Ellie watches the love of her life go through several stages of grief as Deacon and Mrs Flores stay silent. “Isabella? Come on Issie… it’s me, it’s Aster. Please talk to me, Isabella.”

“Daddy said I’m not allowed to…” Aster’s sister starts to speak, only to get hushed by their Mother quickly, the girl falling silent but fixing Aster with a frown.

Ellie can feel Aster shake through the hands that are attached together, she wants to pull her away, to protect her… but Ellie knows that much like she had to come to terms with herself, Aster has to do the same. Ellie can’t protect her from that, no matter how much she wants too. And so, she stays silent.

“Is that it then, I’m no longer your daughter?” Aster sputters, once again to deaf ears, her heart worn on her sleeve as she all but begs her parents to see her.

Ellie watches as the crowd begins to catch on, whispers run rampant, and people begin to stare.

“You know what Dad? You preach about love. Kindness. What’s right or wrong, but you don’t live it.” 

Deacon Flores turns to her now. “It’s a sin, Aster. I’ll pray for your soul, but I can’t condone your actions.”

Everyone is silent now; watching, staring, stuck like glue on the scene unfolding before them. Ellie feels suddenly as small and fragile as she did in the Church, when she interrupted Trig Carson’s proposal to the woman who she’s now sure she can’t live without. This time though, Aster is holding her hand, and tucked into her side, and as much as Ellie wants to leap to her defense, she knows better than to.

Ellie Chu already said all she knows about love, and now it’s Aster Flores’ turn to do the same thing.

“Love can’t be wrong, Dad.” Aster says, her voice broken and bleeding, but strong none the less.

This is the hill Aster Flores chooses to die on.

She has spent far too long being the person that everyone else wants her to be, she has whittled herself into the model daughter, the model student, the model friend, the model girlfriend…

The model girl.

She’s spent two years being everything that she’s wanted to be, and it’s all worked out for her. Aster Flores has friends, actual friends who love her for her. Aster Flores has a significant other, one that supports her wholeheartedly. Aster Flores has a family, it may not be hers by blood, but she knows that they will do anything to keep her safe. To keep her loved.

Paul, Mr. Chu, Christie, Cody, Jeremy are her family. 

Ellie Chu is her family.

“I’m sorry that you can’t understand that, I still love you… and Mami, and Isabella. You are my family, but you are not the only family I have.” Her voice doesn’t waver as much, and somewhere amongst the whispers she hears a few voices shouting out at her. 

“Yeah, go Aster, you got this!” Paul screams from where he’s preparing a hot dog for the Mayor.

“We love you girl, that won’t ever change!” Christie yells from beside him, handing out ice cream.

It’s the unspoken support from Ellie Chu that gives Aster Flores the last little bit of encouragement that she needs. She squeezes Ellie’s hands and meets her Father’s eyes. “I am not going to sacrifice my own happiness for anyone else, not anymore.”

When Aster Flores and Ellie Chu came back to Squahamish, it was obvious how much Ellie Chu had changed over the span of two years difference. 

When Aster Flores and Ellie Chu left Squahamish again, it was even more obvious how much Aster Flores had changed in that time instead.

Aster Flores had become free.


	9. Because you make me not scared anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're coming to the last two chapters of this fanfiction, I hope everyone's been enjoying it!

_Because you make me not scared anymore._

“Do you really think she’ll say yes?” Ellie paced the floor of her living room nervously. Paul sat on the couch opposite from Ellie, watching as she practically wore a hole through the hardwood floor with anxiety.

Paul shrugged at first, but catching the eye of his best friend, he knew she needed reassurances and comfort. “Of course she will.” He finally said, patting the spot beside him for her to sit. She wouldn’t.

“Ellie you’ve been together for three years. She said yes to Trig, so she has to say yes to you.” He reasoned.

Ellie threw her arms up in the air. “That’s the point! She was willing to settle with Trig, I don’t want her to feel like she has to settle with me!” Paul watched as his friend continued to pace back and forth across the floor, face more and more upset until she finally exploded with a cry of. “I just want her to be happy!”

It was unlike her.

Ellie Chu was normally very calm, very level-headed. The only time he had ever seen her blow up like this, was the first time they had talked about the love letter… and he accused her of never being in love. It seemed that love really put her out of her comfort.

And just how Aster Flores had been the catalyst in the first time she barked at him, Aster Flores was once again the key to the pacing anxiety Ellie had.

“Ellie, she is happy, I’ve seen the way she lights up around you.” He started with, the soft smile on his face coming from a place of adoration for both women. He had started this relationship with an infatuation for Aster Flores, fell for Ellie Chu along the way and it had all developed into the truest love for them both. “It was always you, that much is obvious.”

“What if she isn’t ready, Paul?”

He glanced at her, patting the spot beside him once more, moving to grab her arm and practically dragged her into a hug when she wouldn’t come to him willingly. “Then you keep loving her until she is ready.”

Ellie melted against him, curling up into her closest friend as he patted her back and reassured her once more. For someone who once wrote a letter about his dead grandmother, he was surprisingly good with words when it came to reassuring Ellie Chu. 

She supposed she had given him lots of practice.

“What if she’s never ready, Paul?” Her voice was small and quiet, words spoken against his shoulder blade as he continued to hug her tightly against his chest.

“Does that really matter?” Paul asked, pulling back to look at his best friend. “If she is never ready, will you suddenly stop being in love with the Aster Flores?”

“No.”

“Then do it. She could say no, but she could say yes.”

Ellie stared at him for a moment before the smile slowly started in on her cheeks, and she teased him a little by smacking him in the arm, only lightly for him. “When did you get so smart on me, Munsky?”

Paul shrugged his shoulders, fixing her with his own goofy grin, as she pushed away from him and got back up again. He could only laugh this time. “Don’t blame me, Chu, you’re the one that made me read.”

_________________ 

It’s almost a month later by the time that Ellie has the plans together, dragging Paul into as much of it as humanly possible. He doesn’t really help, though, Ellie has something clear in her mind and won’t deviate from it as much as he tries to offer his advice.

Paul’s job is to sit there, as Ellie rants about her ideas, and to smile and nod whenever she looks at him.

He is more than okay with this job, it gives him the opportunity to think about other things, like expanding his food truck business to include a few employees, so that he doesn’t need to completely close down whenever he wants to vacation to visit Ellie, Aster, or his own girlfriend, Christie. 

It’s not that he isn’t listening… just that Ellie has told him her exactly plan over and over again that Paul’s pretty sure he could recite the entire proposal to Aster word for word and be just as good at it.

He offered Ellie that option once… If looks could kill.

She takes off of work on the day that she’s going to propose, and makes him sit with her for four hours, waiting for Aster to get off of work so that she doesn’t go insane from the anticipation of that night.

Paul doesn’t have the heart to tell Ellie, that she went insane a month ago, and hasn’t quite returned yet.

When Aster calls Ellie to tell her she’s on her way home, Paul is so excited that he squeezes his best friend a little too tightly, and practically skips back to Christie’s apartment so that Ellie can get ready.

When he bursts through his girlfriend’s door, she fixes him with a look that he meets by twirling her around in her own kitchen happily, her confused look only growing. “What the hell is going on?” Christie asks.

“I’m not supposed to tell you yet, but it’s happening right now anyway, so I guess it’s fine!” He lets it all out in a single breath. “Ellie’s proposing to Aster tonight!”

Christie lets out a laugh. “You’re kidding me!” 

It’s Pauls turn to look confused for a moment, before he meets her eye and follows it’s trail over to her cellphone sitting on the table, swiped open with a single message from Aster Flores on it’s screen.

“I think tonight’s the night!”

_________________

Ellie is quiet the entire night. Her nerves shake her the moment that Aster gets home. Her words are lost as they make dinner together. Her voice gone as they sit down over it. Ellie can’t even answer as Aster asks her questions about her day, afraid that her voice is going to betray her and ruin the beautiful moment planned.

The longer that Ellie is silent, the more anxious Aster gets in turn. They’ve never been able to keep quiet, not to each other. Unlike a couple that gets comfort in shared silence, Aster and Ellie have always been the couple to rant at the end of a long day.

Every meal is usually filled with debate, them both smiling around bites of whatever dinner they’ve made as they go back and forth about a book, or an event, something they have passion in. Every pillow talk they chat about their dreams, hopes, and futures. 

They never stop speaking, mostly because they never seem to run out of things to say to each other.

Hearing Ellie so quiet makes Aster nervous beyond belief, her heart racing with fear of the unknown until Ellie finally makes a sound. A quiet sound, one that Aster has to strain to hear. “We need to talk.”

Aster Flores feel her heart drop into her stomach.

“What’s wrong?” She whispers, laying her fork down on her plate, pasta completely forgotten about as she watches Ellie. Aster can normally read the look on Ellie’s eyes, but this time it’s completely unreadable. “Are you okay? Is it something I did? Are you upset with me? I can fix it, whatever it is, baby.”

Her words come out as a ramble, very unlike Aster, and Ellie’s eyes widen as the girl continues to ramble. 

Ellie Chu has apparently broken Aster Flores.

“We’ve gone through so much, I’m sure whatever this is, whatever you are feeling… we can get through it too.” Aster won’t stop, and Ellie flushes red, trying to cut in with little words of ‘um’ and ‘actually’ that are completely missed by her nerve-wracked girlfriend.

“Aster…” Ellie tries to cut in.

Aster can’t hear her through her own ramblings.

“Aster!” Ellie yells, finally able to find the words that escaped her not long ago and lets out a flurry of words. “There is no problem, I’m trying to propose!”

Aster immediately goes quiet, her eyes going wide as Ellie pulls out a small box, and opens it up to show off a small, dainty engagement ring that’s obviously been around for a while. “It’s my Mothers.” Ellie explains.

Mouth dropping open, a sound escapes Aster’s lips that Ellie can’t quite pick up on. Then it happens again. It takes about a minute for Ellie to realize that Aster is laughing, full on laughing, and her face falls.

“What’s so funny?” She whispers, her heart absolutely crushed, before Aster leans across the table stretching her hand out for Ellie to take and hold.

“Ellie…” She trails off, the smile not leaving her lips as her other hand moves quickly, holding out her own box. “This.” She flips up the lid to show an engagement ring inside as well, this one a little newer, but no less lovingly picked, the gem’s colour reflects Ellie’s favourite colour. “I’m proposing too.”

_________________

It’s three hours later in bed that they finally have the chance to talk, a smile on Aster’s face as she holds her hand out with the ring placed on it, watching as it sparkles in the dim light of their bedroom.

“You know, you never actually answered.” Ellie teases, pressing her face against the slick, flush skin of Aster’s neck, nude bodies wrapping around each other and entwining like they were always meant to fit that way.

Aster rolls her eyes playfully, turning her head to press her lips against Ellie’s once more, her own tease coming out. “Oh I’m sorry, did you answer me when you pinned me to the wall and kissed me?” Aster murmurs against Ellie’s throat, the other girl moaning softly against her lips. “I must have missed it…”

Ellie swats at Aster playfully, hands grazing at the bare sides of her girlfriend - no, fiancee, as she kisses her again, a little harder. “You never actually answered me…” She teases again, her lips trail across Aster’s cheeks and up to her ear, whispering the words softly.

“You never actually asked me.” Aster teases right back, slipping herself overtop of Ellie as she pins the girl to the bed with a kiss and a grin. “Go ahead, baby.”

“Aster Flores…” Ellie whispers, taking a long enough pause to get a playful nudge out of Aster, who’s patience is non-existent and who’s teasing her completely in all the right ways. “Will you marry me?”

Aster smirks, as she bends down to capture Ellie’s lips, heart racing as she nods and whispers. “Absolutely.”


	10. And I stand here today, to make sure you know, that no matter what we have to face, we do it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, when I originally posted this story on Tumblr, this was my final chapter... However, I had planned a secret Easter Egg in the vows that Aster says to Ellie, that alerted everyone to the fact that there will be an epilogue. Can any of you find out what that Easter Egg is? Here's a hint, it has to do with Aster's vows and the titles of each chapter.

_And I stand here today, to make sure you know, that no matter what we have to face, we do it together._

Edwin Chu was a man of few words, but not few emotions, though he tried to keep them hidden.

When Ellie and Aster had left Squahamish to go off to school, he had struggled to keep his fears, worries and sadness over being left alone, to himself. He hadn’t know Aster for long, but his heart had gone out to the girl, and so he had given them both food for the journey, a tight hug and made a promise to call. 

When his girls had moved into their first apartment together, he had been the doting Dad, inspecting every inch of their new home to make sure it was safe, helping move all of their furniture in, and making sure they were settled before he had gone back home to Squahamish with Paul Munsky.

When his girls had graduated, he had been there at both graduations (staying the extra few days to do so), clapping as loudly as he could when ‘Ellie Chu’ and ‘Aster Flores’ were called. He had beamed with pride, took the stereotypical pictures with both the graduates, and treated them to dinner afterwards, telling anyone who would listen at the restaurant that his daughters had just graduated. With honours.

Still, with each moment, Edwin Chu had managed to never shed a tear, not publicly at least. That was him. Paul was the crier, Edwin was the stoic silent support. 

Ellie had come to expect it from him. 

She hadn’t expected to see glistening of tears in her Father’s eyes as her and Aster sat on the couch across from him, asking him if he would consider not just walking Ellie down the aisle, but walking Aster as well.

It hadn’t been much of a decision, Aster’s family still had not gotten on board with her relationship, and in all honesty? Edwin had been more of a parent to her in the past four and a half years, than her parents could ever be. It was either him, or Paul Munsky, to walk her down the aisle… and Edwin just felt right.

“Please, Edwin, I can’t think of anyone better.” Aster smiled, Ellie’s hand wrapped around hers tightly.

Ellie let Aster do all of the talking, it was her question to ask, and instead she watched as her Dad’s eyes went big, a tear forming in his eyes as he nodded his head, excitement and pride clearly swelling up in him.

“Yes, Aster, I am honoured.”

_________________ 

The wedding was small and simple.

It found Ellie dressed in a white blouse and matching white pants, standing at the altar after having been walked to Paul’s side by her Father. She stood in front of an officiant, Paul whom was her obvious best man, stood a foot behind her, and Christie whom was Aster’s maid of honour stood across from Ellie.

The crowd of people was small, only about thirty guests in attendance, a mixture of friends, coworkers and professors they had grown especially close with.

It had the feel of a backyard wedding, chairs were set up on the grass, ribbons were woven between trees and flower petals had been spread along the ground to create an ‘aisle’. There was soft lighting, the sweet smell of summer air, and everyone dressed casually.

When the music started up, one of Ellie’s tutored students from school playing a violin for the cost of free tutoring for a month, the group stood and turned to watch as Edwin Chu and Aster Flores appeared from around the corner of the small rented building they were using afterwards as a reception party hall.

Aster Flores was dressed in a flowy white sundress, delicate lace stitching over the bodice of the dress. Her hair was pinned up, two symmetrical curls framing the sides of her face, and a trimmed white orchid had been gently woven through her up-do.

The wedding was far from being extravagant; Ellie had wanted to offer Aster so much more than she could have, but it had been put together carefully. 

Free tutoring had covered both the music, and the bartending for the event. Aster had painted a giant mural for the children’s recreation club that was run out of the party hall and that had gotten them discounted access for eight hours on a Friday evening that it wasn’t being used. Paul was catering, Christie and her design friends had created a lot of the decorations, and a few more of their friends had manned the preparation and cleaning up team.

They had put together the specifics of the wedding in the barely three months post-graduation before Ellie was set to start working at a publishing company.

And every last detail, was perfect…

As Aster came down the aisle, Ellie felt her eyes well up with the soft prickling of tears. A light elbow jab and whisper into her ear of “Wuss,” kept her on her toes, with a pretend glare behind at her bestfriend.

Ellie’s father and fiancee finally made it down the aisle, a beam on Edwin Chu’s face as the officiant asked who it was giving these two girls to each other, and he answered with a smile of pride and an “I am.”

_________________

When it came time for their vows, it was a mixture of irony and nostalgia that both girls pulled out pieces of paper, formatted like letters… written to each other.

“Dear Aster Flores, a good man once told me, that love is shown by the efforts you make towards someone else. That the more you love them, the more effort you put into them.” Ellie smiles at Paul for a moment before turning back towards Aster. 

“While I can agree with that, I also know, that loving you… takes no effort at all. I love you in the morning, when I first see you, and during the day, when I think of you. I love you at night, when I get to come home to you. I loved you without even trying, I loved you while actively trying not too because my friend was in love with you.” Aster laughs softly at the memory.

“Loving you takes no effort, it’s just something that comes naturally to me, and I know that it will always come naturally to me, even if we fight, even if we yell, even when we don’t want to talk to each other. I will still love you, no effort needed.” 

Aster lets out another soft laugh, that turns into a bit of a happy sob as she squeezes Ellie’s hands tightly. “How do I follow that?” She teases, their friends and family laughing in the background.

“Dear Ellie Chu, I am in love with you. I think I knew it, long before the letters. I was scared to admit the truth, but here goes. You are my breath while underwater. You are my light in the dark. You are the song I can’t stop singing.” Ellie blushes softly.

“You understand me, when nobody else can. I’ll stay by your side, even when scared. Because you make me not scared anymore. And I stand here today, to make sure you know, that no matter what we have to face, we do it together. Our story is far from over.”

They are pronounced wife and wife, Paul shouts in glee, and the entirety of the guests at their wedding cheer happily (some hysterically enthusiastic) when they get to share the first kiss of the rest of their lives.

_________________

It’s hours later, when Ellie and Aster Flores-Chu finally get a moment to themselves to talk quietly.

For such a thrifty throw together party, it quickly starts to take on the chaos of a large wedding. It seems not before long, almost everyone wants to make a speech about the newlyweds. 

It starts with Cody and Jeremy, they’ve stayed the closest to them (other than Christie) out of the original theatre group that sparked them to acknowledge their feelings. This very story gets told, in detail by Jeremy, Ellie’s jealousy, Aster not knowing. Ellie groans the whole time, but everyone else loves it. Aster only fixes her a smirk.

Cody then takes his turn and talks about their first anniversary, how Ellie gave Aster a book and he was so sure that it wasn’t going to last (He winks at Ellie, her face drops into her hands in embarrassment). Everyone laughs when Aster shouts out that it’s the best damn book she’s ever been given.

Christie talks about when they moved in, Paul shares the entire story of how Aster and Ellie even came to be, both girls flash him looks that could kill, even though it’s all water under the bridge by that point.

The speeches end with one by Edwin Chu. He speaks slowly, like it’s very practiced (judging by the look of pride Paul gives Edwin, Ellie can tell that he had coached Edwin through the whole thing… multiple times) but tells the story of the moment he knew Aster was destined to be his child too.

By the time he’s done speaking and sits down, Ellie has to wipe tears out of her wife’s eyes, kiss her better.

The party turns to food, then dancing, until finally it’s hours later and the only two left on the dance floor are Ellie and Aster, swaying softly to their song, played for the third or fourth time during that night.

“Was it everything you imagined?” Ellie whispers, brushing the curls out of Aster’s eyes, her hair having come down from it’s bun halfway through speeches.

“Even better.” Aster admits, head resting on Ellie’s shoulder as she curls against her wife contently.

Ellie smiles, her arms wrapping around Aster’s waist firmly as she holds her tightly to her. “Good, because we’ve both still got to work Monday.”

“Shhh… For the next two days, we’re honeymooning in our apartment, with the cat, no work talk allowed.” 

“I swear I’ll take us on a real honeymoon one day.” Ellie promises, as Aster’s head lifts from her shoulder to stare her directly in the eyes with a grin.

“I don’t care baby, this is perfect enough for me, besides… we have the rest of our lives still.”

Ellie nods. “I guess our story has a happy ending?”

Aster laughs this time, ducking to kiss Ellie gently on the lips, eyes sparkle with mischief as she murmurs.

“And to think, it’s all because you took a bold stroke.”


	11. Our story is far from over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for joining me on this journey! I'm glad a few of you noticed the Easter Egg, and how it all fit together. As some of you might have noticed, there was one more sentence of Aster's vows that didn't fit a chapter title, well now it does! Stay tuned, because I'll be posting the other things that I have worked on for this couple over the next few days!

_Our story is far from over._

“It’s beautiful, Mami!” Five year old Susan Marie Flores-Chu said with a soft sigh as she glanced out at the hot spring she stood beside, eyes wide in delight.

“It is, and look, there are deciduous trees.” Ellie teased, pointing at the trees that surrounded them before she began to pull her shirt up and over her head. A blue one-piece swimsuit sat underneath her clothes. 

Aster laughed lightly, before turning to their daughter with a soft smile. “They aren’t, don’t believe Mommy.” She corrected, Ellie gave a squawk of disapproval as Aster teasingly pushed her towards the water’s edge. 

“They could be.” Ellie feigned a pout as she dipped a toe into the warm and calming waters, stripping her pants off before slipping into the spring quickly.

It had been fifteen years since their very first trip to the spring, and while nothing had changed in the little slice of heaven that Aster had kept all to herself (with the exception of Ellie), a lot had changed in the girls.

The first and most glaringly obvious, was how comfortable Ellie had become in herself. Gone were the days of wearing three layers to go swimming in, and hiding her eyes from Aster. Ellie wasn’t shy anymore, modest maybe, but definitely not shy of herself, of her body or of talking to Aster.

I mean, they were married now, and had been for almost a decade. The time for shy was long gone.

The second, was how Aster had changed. Gone were the days of being quiet, and following what everyone else expected her too. College had been the thing to start a change. Her relationship with Ellie saw hate from the people who were supposed to love her unconditionally, this furthered her want to be herself.

Marriage took the change and ran with it. With Ellie endlessly supporting her, Aster no longer felt the need to compromise to fit in or appease people.

Motherhood was the last nail in the coffin though. The moment baby Susie was placed in Aster’s arms, the woman had known she would do anything to make her know how loved she was. Nobody elses opinion mattered except for her child. That was that. 

The final change, was the way Ellie and Aster acted with each other. The first time they went to the hot spring, there was all that barely repressed longing.

Fifteen years later, there was still longing but absolutely none of it could be called repressed.

“Here, Susie, let Mami help you.” Aster smiled, her daughter holding her arms up so that Aster could help her slip her dress off and over her head. “There.”

The little girl beamed, twirling in a circle to show off her rainbow swimsuit as Ellie smiled and held out her arms for the little girl. “Come to Mommy.”

_________________

After Ellie helped their daughter get into the hot spring, followed by Aster stepping in beside them, the three Flores-Chu women finally got to relax.

Aster brought out the old CD-player, but instead of using the radio part, she slipped in a CD that lit up Ellie’s face almost immediately with a smile.

“Is this-?” She trailed off, catching Aster’s eye.

“’Seventeen’. Sharon Van Etten. I also put ‘If You Leave Me Now’ from Chicago, but that plays later.”

“I haven’t heard this song since our wedding.” Ellie closed her eyes with a smile, Susie leaning back against her Mommy’s chest to shut her eyes too.

“It’s like my memories come flooding back with each note and chord, plucking a symphony of days lived so long ago.” Aster whispered softly, her eyes not leaving Ellie’s other than to look down at their daughter.

Ellie cracked an eye open. “Who said that?”

“I don’t know.”

Ellie glanced towards Aster, a soft look mirrored as she echoed the words spoken what felt like both yesterday and a lifetime ago. “Then you said it.”

They stared in silence, smiles on their faces as they lost themselves in the music for a moment.

If they had known, how monumental their lives could have been so much sooner, their day at the hot spring fifteen years ago may have gone so very different. No confessions in front of everyone at church, no looks of betrayal, no having to chase Aster down with an apology later, words left only partially said.

They might have been able to make that day at the hotspring the only explanation necessary in the tale.

“Mami… Mommy…” A small voice broke through. 

But then, they might not have had Grinnell and University of Iowa. They might not have had the theatre troupe. They might not have had that fateful party, or being each other’s anchor to hold to, or moving in together to avoid a return to Squahamish.

They might not have had Susie.

“Yes, sweet girl?” Aster broke the silence first, moving to pull the child out of Ellie’s arms and cuddling her close to her chest with a contented sigh.

That was not an option, everything had gone exactly how it was supposed to, Susie was proof of that.

“Is this where you and Mommy had your first date?” The child asked, hands reaching up to play with her mother’s hair as she floated safely in her arms.

“Yes.” 

“No.”

“Sorta?” They both finally agreed on.

The five year old glanced between both of her mothers with a confused look on her face before shrugging with a happy exclaim. “Well it’s very pretty!”

This time Ellie answered, swimming the distance between her and Aster to wrap her arms around both of her girls. “I agree, Susie, you couldn’t be more right.”

_________________

A couple of hours later, Ellie and Aster finally pulled their waterlogged and pruny kindergartener out of the hot spring and wrapped her tightly in a towel.

“Aw.” The child yawned, wrapping her arms around Ellie’s neck as her Mommy carried her away from the water. “I wanted to stay longer…” She whispered, fighting exhaustion the entire way to the car. “It’s fun.”

By the time Ellie got her buckled into her carseat, the child was fast asleep, a knowing expression exchanged from Aster to Ellie. “Think she’ll sleep the whole way back to Dad’s?” Ellie asked, a playful look in her eyes as she cornered her wife against the car.

“Definitely.” Aster breathed out, smirking into the kiss that followed, arm coming up to wrap around Ellie’s shoulders as she pulled her closer to deepen the kiss.

Ellie laughed against Aster’s lips with a giggle. “Finally, adult time.” She whispered, pulling back from Aster quickly, the brunette grumbling at being left as Ellie pointed at her with a smile. “Sylvia Plath quotes, the first incorrect quote has to do the dishes. I’ll go first.”

Aster’s mouth fell open for a second, staring as Ellie moved to the other side of the car before a triumphant sound exited her. “You are so on, Chu!”

“Love life day by day, color by color, touch by touch.” Ellie said getting into the car. “And it’s Flores-Chu.”

Aster waited until their seatbelts were on before putting the car into drive, turning her head to her wife with a simple yet deliciously evil grin. “Opinions are like orgasms…mine matters most and I really don’t care if you have one.” Ellie’s mouth dropped open.

“Rude.”

“But a good quote, nonetheless.”

“Please don’t expect me to always be good and kind and loving. There are times when I will be cold and thoughtless and hard to understand.” Ellie bit back.

“Oooh, that’s a good one.”

“Thank you, thank you.”

_________________

The end of the night saw Aster winning the Plath-off, after Ellie’s quote of “It is so much safer not to feel, not to let the world touch me.” was interrupted by Susie waking up and loudly asking when they were going to be there because she was sooooo bored.

It also saw, Ellie reluctantly doing the dishes, only to be helped by Aster who felt bad about how she won.

Most importantly, it had Ellie and Aster watching in delight as their five year old not only stumped her Grandpa in a nice game of Scrabble, but also her Uncle Paul. The former claimed that he let the child win, the latter though, they all knew it was a genuine win for Susie, when he loudly proclaimed how unfair it was to go against a kid with ‘book nerds’ for Moms.

His words, not theirs.

As the sun fell and the night rose, Edwin Chu and Susan Flores-Chu fell asleep on the couch together, a movie on in the background, as they cuddled.

Paul eventually went home to Christie and their three kids, two of whom were down with a flu that nobody wanted Susie to catch (they made plans to get Susie together with her cousins at another time) and the wives made their way out to the train station, cramming into the station box for old times.

“Did you picture it would go this way?” Ellie asked, her arms wrapped around Aster who was perched on her lap… the only way the two would fit together in the small glass station box. “The first time we kissed?”

“Oh, you mean when you kissed me?” 

“You kissed back you know.” Ellie retorted.

“Yes I did.” Aster laughed, leaning back against her wife, head lolling onto her shoulder. “I did know it would turn out like this… Because the first time you kissed me, I knew I never wanted to be kissed by anyone else ever again. I just knew it was big.”

“And yet you still let me leave?” Ellie pressed her lips against the top of Aster’s head with a soft kiss.

“I couldn’t stop you…” Aster paused. “Besides, why do you think I texted you the very next day?”

“I don’t know…” Ellie admitted, with a shrug.

Aster leaned up, pressing her lips to Ellie’s chin for a moment before reaching her lips as well. “I may have let you leave, Ellie, but I wasn’t about to let you go.”


End file.
